Lily is 18 pounds. I remember growing up we had one wall in our house reserved for measuring our height as we grew. My sisters and I would stand in front of it and mark the wall above our head. I remember making my body as straight and as tall as possible, just so I could get that line a little higher and a little closer to sister’s. I want to do that with Lily. I have a poster which serves the same purpose, that way we can take it with us wherever we move. I am going to start this week since the ruler starts at 2 feet high.

She is learning new things every day. The last couple days she has learned to whine. I think Shammy Shoe taught her because she sounds like a sad puppy. I don’t think she is even sad when she does it. She also makes this strange noise that makes me laugh and the more I laugh the more she makes the noise and smiles. It is really cute.

She doesn’t like it when other people hold her now and if I am not here to put her to bed, forget about sleeping. For example last night, Lily and I met Jen and Kim for dinner. Kim was trying to hold her but Lily would just start balling every time. As soon as I would take her back, she would stop. So after dinner we came back to the house. Stan was watching Lily while me, Jen and Kim went down to the spa (The first time I have taken a Lily break in quite a while, much needed). This was around Lily’s bed time and I am usually the one who puts her to sleep (I think I have only missed one night of that since she was born). She did not like the fact that I wasn’t there. She terrorized her Daddy until she couldn’t cry anymore and then passed out. I noticed this starting about a month ago. I secretly don’t mind…I feel sad when she isn’t around too. But I think if it goes on I will never be able to get a baby sitter or have a life outside of Lily. It is nice though to have some confirmation that she likes me back, at least a little.

It is interesting to see how other people handle her though. Especially Jen, who is actually more scared of babies than of ax murders. If you gave her the option of holding a baby or jumping off a 10 story building, I have no doubt she would at least consider the jump. I suppose I was the same way before Lily though. I remember when my sister’s son, Aidan, was just a baby. I think he must have been 4 months old. I tried to hold him and he just started balling. I was paralyzed and kind of held him out all awkwardly until she could come take him. So, there is hope for Jen. I think motherly instinct does exist but in some cases, like Jen and I, you are unable to tap into it until the moment is right.

Now, I do see a distinct difference between myself and my single/childless friends. For a while, I couldn’t really pin my finger on exactly what it was. After All, it wasn’t more than a year ago that I was exactly like them. I could travel on a moments notice, wear three inch heels (and love it) or even just make it to the gym. I have come to the realization that, for the rest of my twenties, I will not spend nights out on the town in very cute outfits, but rather most of my nights will be spent wiping snotty noses, changing diapers and snuggling the most love-able baby that ever lived…in pajamas. But that is OK with me. I love it. Given the choice, being with Lily is where I want to be. I guess that is just it then, I’ve joined the mommy club…